Motherhood

Almost two years ago, God blessed me with a special assignment, to raise a child. He allowed my body to carry him and nuture him for nine months. I shared a special, intimate time with him that no one else will ever know. Upon his birth, I was able to be with Joshua every moment for the first year of his life. As his second birthday quickly approaches, I have had a wonderful time of reflecting on the first two years of his life. It is truly amazing how we become so much in love with our children even before we have seen them. He was so much a part of my heart from the moment I knew I was pregnant.

I will always remember our first moments alone together after he was born, how in those sweet glances and soft touches, my life was forever changed. Through the thousands of diapers, breastfeeding, bottles, the never ending spit up(which once landed right on top of my head), the long nights, frustrating days, moments of "I can't do this," laughter, tears, food throwing and temper tantrums, I have become a mother.

Already those sweet glances and soft touches don't happen as often, he is usually too busy for down time with Momma. He is almost 2, and I'm in awe of how much he has developed in such a short time. Two years ago he was cooing and swinging his arms around, now he's saying 3 or 4 words together and throwing me a ball. Wow! For anyone out there who doesn't believe in God, I ask you to watch a woman's belly grow over nine months, see a baby be born, then watch that child grow.

Joshua has had bronchitis, he was doing so good for a few weeks and then bam, he gets hit with it all over again. So, we are back on with all the breathing treatments, antibiotics and steroids. That little boy's lungs love to build up with fluid. He really put on a show for the Dr., he started singing his ABC's. The Dr. was thrilled and says that he is smart for his age. Now, he may have just said that to humor me, but I don't care, Joshua is a genius! I hate seeing him sick and not feeling good, but I do secretly love that he wants to do nothing but cuddle up with me. Joshua only needed one day of that and he is back to himself.

Overall, we are doing fantastic. I have had some bad days and am trying very hard to stay positive and look towards the future when we can all move on.